Thursday, June 5, 2014

ATF: Amos and Ahab

This weekly series will include as many of my all-time favorite (ATF) tunes as I can get my grubby little hands on (so to speak).  Now, each one included in each edition will have some connection with the other—albeit only as a figment of my imagination, but they will not be numbered.  For I just cannot bring myself to rate some higher than others.  So, this will not be a countdown, but if you are enjoying them as much as I do, it won’t matter.  Besides, with no countdown, this could go on forever and ever!  Oh, and despite the fact that there is absolutely no way that your musical tastes can be as exquisite as mine, I welcome any suggestions you might dare to make.  For I am, after all, quite magnanimous by nature.



Amos Moses
Jerry Reed
Yeah

Here comes Amos

Now Amos Moses was a Cajun
He lived by his self in the swamp
He hunted alligator for a livin'
He just knocked 'em in the head with a stump
The Louisiana law gonna get you Amos
It ain't legal huntin' alligators down in the swamp boy
Now everybody blamed his old man
For makin' him mean as a snake
When Amos Moses was a boy
His daddy'd use him for alligator bait
Tie a rope around his waist
And throw him in the swamp
Alligator bait in the Louisiana bayou

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana
Lived a man called Doc Milsap
And his pretty wife Hanna
Well they raised up a son
That could eat up his weight in groceries
Named him after a man of the cloth
Called him Amos Moses

Yeah

Now the folks around south Louisiana
Said Amos was a helluva man
He could trap the biggest
The meanest alligator
And just use one hand
That's all he got left ‘cause a alligator bit it
Left arm gone clean up to the elbow
Well the sheriff got wind that Amos
Was in the swamp trappin' alligator skin
So he snuck in the swamp
Gonna get you boy
But he never come out again
Well I wonder where the Louisiana sheriff went to
Well you can sure get lost in the Louisiana bayou

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana
Lived a cat called Doc Milsap
And his pretty wife Hanna
Well they raised up a son
That could eat up his weight in groceries
Named him after a man of the cloth
Called him Amos Moses

Sit down on ‘em Amos

Make it count son

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana
Lived a man called Doc Milsap
And his pretty wife Hanna…



Ahab the Arab
Ray Stevens
Let me tell you about
Ahab the Arab
The sheik of the burnin’ sand
He had emeralds
And rubies
Just drippin' off of him
And a ring on every finger of his hand
He wore a big ol' turban
Wrapped around his head
Scimitar by his side
And every evenin'
About midnight
He'd jump on his camel
Named Clyde
And ride

Silently through the night
To the sultan's tent
Where he would secretly meet up with Fatima
Of the seven veils
Swingingest
Grade A
Number one
US choice
Government-inspected
Dancer
In the sultan's whole harem
‘Cause him and her had a thing goin'
Yeah
And they'd been carryin' on
For some time now
Behind the sultan's back
And you could hear him talk to his camel
As he rode out across the dunes
His voice would cut through the still night desert air
And he'd say
“Something”
Which is Arabic for
Whoa baby
And Clyde would say
“Something else”

Well he brought that camel to a screechin' halt
In the rear of Fatima's tent
Jumped off Clyde
Snuck around the corner
And into the tent he went
There he saw Fatima
Layin' on a zebra skin rug
With rings on her fingers
And bells on her toes
And a bone in her nose
Ho ho

There she was friends
Lyin' there in all her radiant beauty
Eatin’ on a
Raisin
Grape
Apricot
Pomegranate
Bowl of chittlin's
Two bananas
Three candy bars
Sipping on an ice cold co-cola
Listenin' to her transistor
And singin’
Does your chewing gum lose its flavor
Ahab walked up to her
Looked down into her eyes
And tenderly he said
“Something”
Which is Arabic for
Let’s twist again like we did last summer baby
She looked up at him from off the rug
Flapped them big ol’ eyelashes
And she’d say
“Something else”

‘Round
And around
And around
And around
And around
And around
And around

All of a sudden
The sultan walked in
Ahab knew that this was the end
Him and Fatima were caught by surprise
And the sultan had fire flashing out of his eyes

Well the Sultan charged at Ahab
Intending to make a dent
In his head
But he fled with Fatima
And out of the tent they went
They jumped on Clyde
Started to ride
Cuttin’ out across the sand
With the sultan’s whole army in hot pursuit
On and on they ran

Well to make a long story short
They got away
‘Cause there weren’t no animal alive
What that could keep up with Clyde
Once he got started
‘Cause he was the fastest steed
On the whole desert there is
Anyway they made it across the border
Where Ahab hocked all his rubies and emeralds
And bought ‘em a swingin’ split-level pad
And they lived happily ever after

And that’s the story about
Ahab the Arab
The sheik of the burnin’ sands
Ahab the Arab
The sheik of the burnin’ sands
Ahab the Arab
The sheik of the burnin’ sands
Ahab the Arab
The sheik of the burnin’ sands
Ahab the Arab
The Sheik of the burnin’ sands

Lyrics From: [elyrics.net]

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6 comments:

  1. Wow! It's years since I've heard "Ahab"! :)

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  2. Thanks for stopping by, my dear Lee!!! Ray Stevens had his own theater down in Branson for several years, with the marquee on the back of a statue of Clyde out front. I sure wish we had of went to at least one of his shows while we were still able to. Yakov Smirnoff also had his own theater down there for while, and he is another one I wish we had of went to see. Sigh,

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  3. It's been a while since I heard either one of these fellows but I did enjoy them back in the day, and listening to them now is still fun.

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  4. I did not know it at the time, but sometime later, I realized that I had actually met Jerry Reed is an up-close and fairly personal way during the summer of 1985. It was while I was working as a fuel attendant for the 76 Truckstop in Amarillo, which was the third job I was working each day during a month-long stretch. He was the passenger in a convertible that had pulled up to the full-service gas pump, and while I was trying to scrape some of the bugs off of the windshield, he asked if I knew where to score some weed. The driver let out a snort and said that he had already had enough, and I said that I did not do that sort of thing. So, I could not be of much help, anyway. They said something about being headed to Illinois to hook up with Willie as they took off, and a couple of years later it dawned on me (so to speak) that they were headed to the first Farm Aid concert in Champaign, Illinois. He is not listed as one of the performers, though.

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  5. oh my, hadn't heard either of these in forever

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  6. Thanks for stopping by, my dear Ann!!! I was the same way until I was reminded of them a few weeks ago. These would be a couple that Wade would really enjoy hearing again--right? (LOL?)

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