ATF: Amos and Ahab

This weekly series will include as many of my all-time favorite (ATF) tunes as I can get my grubby little hands on (so to speak).  Now, each one included in each edition will have some connection with the other—albeit only as a figment of my imagination, but they will not be numbered.  For I just cannot bring myself to rate some higher than others.  So, this will not be a countdown, but if you are enjoying them as much as I do, it won’t matter.  Besides, with no countdown, this could go on forever and ever!  Oh, and despite the fact that there is absolutely no way that your musical tastes can be as exquisite as mine, I welcome any suggestions you might dare to make.  For I am, after all, quite magnanimous by nature.

Link: [Jerry Reed]

Amos Moses

Jerry Reed

Yeah

Here comes Amos

Now Amos Moses was a Cajun

He lived by his self in the swamp

He hunted alligator for a livin'

He just knocked 'em in the head with a stump

The Louisiana law gonna get you Amos

It ain't legal huntin' alligators down in the swamp boy

Now everybody blamed his old man

For makin' him mean as a snake

When Amos Moses was a boy

His daddy'd use him for alligator bait

Tie a rope around his waist

And throw him in the swamp

Alligator bait in the Louisiana bayou

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana

Lived a man called Doc Milsap

And his pretty wife Hanna

Well they raised up a son

That could eat up his weight in groceries

Named him after a man of the cloth

Called him Amos Moses

Yeah

Now the folks around south Louisiana

Said Amos was a helluva man

He could trap the biggest

The meanest alligator

And just use one hand

That's all he got left ‘cause a alligator bit it

Left arm gone clean up to the elbow

Well the sheriff got wind that Amos

Was in the swamp trappin' alligator skin

So he snuck in the swamp

Gonna get you boy

But he never come out again

Well I wonder where the Louisiana sheriff went to

Well you can sure get lost in the Louisiana bayou

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana

Lived a cat called Doc Milsap

And his pretty wife Hanna

Well they raised up a son

That could eat up his weight in groceries

Named him after a man of the cloth

Called him Amos Moses

Sit down on ‘em Amos

Make it count son

About forty-five minutes southeast of Thibadoux Louisiana

Lived a man called Doc Milsap

And his pretty wife Hanna…

Link: [Ray Stevens]

Ahab the Arab

Ray Stevens

Let me tell you about

Ahab the Arab

The sheik of the burnin’ sand

He had emeralds

And rubies

Just drippin' off of him

And a ring on every finger of his hand

He wore a big ol' turban

Wrapped around his head

Scimitar by his side

And every evenin'

About midnight

He'd jump on his camel

Named Clyde

And ride

Silently through the night

To the sultan's tent

Where he would secretly meet up with Fatima

Of the seven veils

Swingingest

Grade A

Number one

US choice

Government-inspected

Dancer

In the sultan's whole harem

‘Cause him and her had a thing goin'

Yeah

And they'd been carryin' on

For some time now

Behind the sultan's back

And you could hear him talk to his camel

As he rode out across the dunes

His voice would cut through the still night desert air

And he'd say

“Something”

Which is Arabic for

Whoa baby

And Clyde would say

“Something else”

Well he brought that camel to a screechin' halt

In the rear of Fatima's tent

Jumped off Clyde

Snuck around the corner

And into the tent he went

There he saw Fatima

Layin' on a zebra skin rug

With rings on her fingers

And bells on her toes

And a bone in her nose

Ho ho

There she was friends

Lyin' there in all her radiant beauty

Eatin’ on a

Raisin

Grape

Apricot

Pomegranate

Bowl of chittlin's

Two bananas

Three candy bars

Sipping on an ice cold co-cola

Listenin' to her transistor

And singin’

Does your chewing gum lose its flavor

Ahab walked up to her

Looked down into her eyes

And tenderly he said

“Something”

Which is Arabic for

Let’s twist again like we did last summer baby

She looked up at him from off the rug

Flapped them big ol’ eyelashes

And she’d say

“Something else”

‘Round

And around

And around

And around

And around

And around

And around

All of a sudden

The sultan walked in

Ahab knew that this was the end

Him and Fatima were caught by surprise

And the sultan had fire flashing out of his eyes

Well the Sultan charged at Ahab

Intending to make a dent

In his head

But he fled with Fatima

And out of the tent they went

They jumped on Clyde

Started to ride

Cuttin’ out across the sand

With the sultan’s whole army in hot pursuit

On and on they ran

Well to make a long story short

They got away

‘Cause there weren’t no animal alive

What that could keep up with Clyde

Once he got started

‘Cause he was the fastest steed

On the whole desert there is

Anyway they made it across the border

Where Ahab hocked all his rubies and emeralds

And bought ‘em a swingin’ split-level pad

And they lived happily ever after

And that’s the story about

Ahab the Arab

The sheik of the burnin’ sands

Ahab the Arab

The sheik of the burnin’ sands

Ahab the Arab

The sheik of the burnin’ sands

Ahab the Arab

The sheik of the burnin’ sands

Ahab the Arab

The Sheik of the burnin’ sands

Lyrics From: [elyrics.net]

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